Why, yes, that IS a giant fiberglass lobster. I really don’t see what’s so odd about that. He is at Ruth and Wimpy’s in Hancock, Maine and is named Wilbur. Yes, like the pig in Charlotte’s Web.
My girlie, on the bridge at the Oriental Garden in Wickham Park.
Yes, she is sticking her tongue out at me. Sigh.
Oh so long ago it seems I went to a new client’s house to photograph a newborn baby girl. She’s bigger now and seemed to like the Holga.
Her parents volunteered her for an analog shoot and not just any analog shoot but a Holga-heavy one.
Of course, I made them be in a few.
We went on vacation up to Maine and though I have a rather large amount of photographs from the trip this one pretty much epitomizes my daughter’s feelings these days towards having her picture taken. She would not look at me. No matter which side of her I went to, she faced the other way. She has a full blown case of “photographer’s child syndrome.”
Maine is where I grew up and, as my husband put it, a large part of my soul lives there, on the shore, no matter where I go.
I opted to leave the digital cameras at home and was, with the exception of about 3 iPhone snaps, wholly film on this trip.
People always want to know what to wear for a portrait session and I’d tell you “wear whatever you normally wear” but, well, I’ve been known to wear some fairly bizarre concoctions if I think I’m not leaving the house and then decide I need to go to the grocery store and there I am in a linen skirt, ratty old t-shirt and crocs and I’d really rather not have myself preserved on film in one of those get-ups. I know I’m a walking “before” picture for a fashion make-over but with small kids and a computer full of backlogged proofing I can’t always quite be bothered and if I do there’s some odd risks involved in clothing when you have preschoolers. Today I’ve stepped in chocolate milk and sat in honey. So I’m going to pretend that you are like me and in your daily life wear things that are, perhaps, not QUITE as lovely as you’d like to present yourself and your family to the world.
So…
Newborns: Newborns should be naked. If you have a special, heirloom outfit or a sweet little sweater someone made for you, have it ready. If you have a quilt someone made for you that is important to you, have it ready. Solid colored, lightweight swaddling fabric is good to have around as are cute hats, simple headbands but don’t feel the need to invest in anything you don’t already have because, well, naked is good.
There, wasn’t that easy? Not even any shopping required.
Girl Children: You should allow her to dress herself and then subtract from the outfit anything you really hate and cannot bear to see on your wall. This IS a portrait of her and her clothing should reflect who she is, not who Gap or Tea Collection want her to be and my goal is to get a portrait of the actual child, not a heavily stylized advertisement for childhood. Be aware that she’ll probably be dirty by the time I’m done with her (I do tend to encourage children to play and that messes them up) so avoid anything so precious you couldn’t bear it if it got stained. Does she have a stuffed bear she won’t put down? Bring it. Does she insist on wearing a tutu over everything, including her snow suit? Leave it. When she’s grown up you’ll want to remember her as she was, tutu, snowsuit, stuffed bear and all.
OK, you want specific instructions. A solid colored dress made out of woven fabric like linen, not a knit or t-shirt type fabric, with some swing to the cut and some texture. Going a size up often helps with the flow. If you keep it simple the final picture will remain about the child, not the styling.
Boy Children Again, the goal is to make a portrait of the child, not a magazine spread, so don’t make yourself nuts with the styling. Let him wear what he likes and take away anything you hate. Jeans, a plain shirt and some kind of layering are perfect. Feel free to invest in a new t-shirt – they often tend to get subtly “pilly” after a while.
Families Unless you tend to wear matching reindeer sweaters in real life, you shouldn’t wear them for your portraits. Instead of trying to match everyone lay out all the things you are thinking of wearing and ask yourself if this would work if it were one outfit. Do the patterns go nicely together? Is there some variety? Then you are good to go!
Things to Avoid
I once, when watching the summer Olympics, observed a man who had just medaled in butterfly, a physically demanding stroke, stand, poolside, in a speedo. This was before swimmers wore full body suits and he was in tight, underwear like spandex. There was a bit of what looked like a spare tire around his waist and I thought if THIS MAN, who is about as physically fit as it is humanly possible to be, looks less than perfect in a speedo there is simply no hope for any other man anywhere.
There are some items of clothing that look bad on you no matter how good you look. Some specific things to avoid:
Adult women often have this weird idea that they need to look like a model to be beautiful. Well, maybe it’s not so weird since we are all bombarded with images of young women made up by experts, with their hair styled by experts, retouched in Photoshop by experts and told that this is what we should look like. Of course, it isn’t possible unless you walk around with a computer generated image floating in front of your face but, hey, telling people if you would just buy our product you might look a tiny bit more like this digitally-retouched 18-year-old with professional hair and make-up works. There are billions of women in the world, of whom maybe several dozen would qualify as supermodels. If that’s what it takes to be beautiful we are living in a dreadfully hideous world. Except, of course, we are not. We live in a world surrounded by beauty at every turn. Like this woman. Not 18-years-old. Not professionally styled. But beautiful.
Max and Lily, for whom the fabulous shop Max and Lily’s Closet was named, took a morning to model for me. They were such sweet kids they were a blast to shoot. Max was, I admit, not into it at first but he ended up giving me one of the few images I titled something more creative than “IMG_5674″ or “Girl with Hat 2″.
The Unbearable Lightness of Boyhood
And the beautiful Lily…
And the pair of them…
And some questions…
Tell me about Max and Lily (the people).
Max is a charmer! He is very smart and certainly ahead of his time. His first word was “WOW” and he would say it in response to EVERYTHING! Carrot..WOW, Wind in his face…WOW, kiss on his cheek…WoW! The way he said it was soo sweet, just a long, bright eyed, WOooooOW! That pretty much sums him up even to this day!
Lily is just a complete sweetheart! She’s a little artist through and through…very creative and sensitive. She wears her heart on her sleeve and is always looking for a cuddle! My room is full of little love notes from her! She is just a complete love bug!
What do they say and do that utterly charms you?
Oh gosh! So many things during the course of their lives have charmed me. Right now though, Lily will spend hours making cards for all the special people in her life! All very personalized and heartfelt. If you get a card from Lily there is no way you can have a bad rest of your day! Listening to Max strum an original on his guitar is just heaven to me.
What are your hopes and dreams for them?
Firstly, I hope I don’t “mess” them up! I’m pretty sure that is a pipe dream as we all end up “messing” up our kid’s in our own special way. I just hope that they grow up in touch with their feelings and confident in who they. Mostly, I hope they feel secure in the world and touch it in their own special way!
What is the best part about motherhood for you?
It would be so hard to nail one thing as “the best” down. There are so many great things about motherhood. The creation of a person followed by the molding of that person into the type of people you would like to be surrounded by all the time…that truly is priceless. Watching that all come to be is amazing!
What is the most challenging part of motherhood for you?
100% the most challenging part of motherhood is managing Max and Lily’s relationship! The other day while I was in the shower and I heard them bickering in the other room, it occurred to me that they are like an old married couple stuck with each other and I am their live in marriage counselor!
How did you get the idea for Max & Lily’s (the store)?
I love consignment shopping! To me, the best part has always been the thrill of the hunt. There is nothing better than coming home with a unique toy or a super cute outfit, especially when I found it at a fraction of the retail price. Not having a consignment store in West Hartford was kind of a bummer. One day in December, I was having breakfast at Moe’s and a store in the plaza was available. My first thought was this is perfect for a consignment store. I inquired about the space the next day and found it was already rented. The idea really stuck with me though and a week or so later I found an even better space on Park Road. I believed in it so much that I didn’t waste any time and even though I had no retail experience (degree in Microbiology) I went for it.
When did you open?
We opened March 1st and moved into our bigger space 2 doors down in the middle of June!
What is the most satisfying thing about running a consignment shop?
Soomany things. Many of which I never would’ve expected. Firstly, I love that we are recycling and offering this service in West Hartford. Secondly, I love the thrill I get when something really great comes in and I know there is a person who is going to come in and find it and it’ll make their day! Mostly, I love the people! I am amazed everyday that I remember everyone’s name and where they are vacationing or where their kids are going to camp this summer. I also love when something comes in and I know just who to call that will love it. I feel so connected to the community since opening the store and I love that the most.
Do you have a funny anecdote from the store you can share?
When we had first opened a woman had brought in what she though were her kids outgrown items that she had asked them to round up. She ripped open the bag and dumped it on the ground (we don’t usually accept items from garbage bags but it was like my first day accepting) and out comes an entire garbage bag full of underwear and other under-garments. It was a horrifying moment when she realized she had grabbed the wrong bag and quickly collected her things and returned home for the actual bag. That cracked me up.
Also, we have a dress in the store that has been bought, worn for a special occasion, and re-consigned 3 times. It may be pink but it is also very green.
There have been so many heartwarming stories as well, I feel like after only 4 months in business I could write a book about the warm fuzzy stuff.
Any advice from the trenches of working motherhood?
Being new to working motherhood I consider myself more of an advice taker than giver. One thing though, if you’re going to bring your kids to work with you make sure you bring along snacks….lots and lots of snacks! I won Wolfie over with wheat thins. My kids are not that easy. The other day Max requested Duck and Shrimp for lunch.
Thanks!
